F is for Fuck it
G is for God make it stop
H is for when the Hell will this be over?
Early in the shelter at home phase I had two homes and was busily packing up one and moving to the other. I went out and was very busy every day, though I was “home” most of the time (our two places were ten minutes apart). Now we are fully in the new place, and sure, I could unpack more, but I’m exhausted, and I’m back at work having multiple Zoom meetings a day, prepping for online instruction, responding to students, and realizing I have jowels and a much looser neck than I ever noticed before. Sure, I could spend time on better lighting or wear turtlenecks, but I can’t be bothered. I don’t love looking at myself talk, but whatever.
Pandemic times are getting real, so fuck it. I’ve had a hard few days.
G is for fucking Gratitude also.
Glad I have a dog that needs a walk every day.
Glad I found a cool dingy little park on the site of a canal built in 1795. Canal Park, South Hadley.
Glad it’s spring though it’s fucking cold.
Glad my parents don’t have to see the shitshow our country has become, though I would also love to hear my mother’s insights. She would be able to take an intellectual interest in it all and give me a lens I hadn’t thought of to see it through.
Glad for Zoom even though it’s driving home how old I look/am.
Glad my family is not sick.
Glad I do not have small children. Props to all who are coping with this.
Glad my grandniece and grandnephew have such fabulous parents to stay home with them and glad I get photo and video updates on the regular.
Glad for social media and feeling connected virtually.
Glad for cursing. It helps.
I love it — gratitude, cursing, aging, jowls, the whole 9 yards!
Aw, thanks, Laurie! Zoom is so harsh on my neck!
I’m practicing up my swearing. Always had to suppress that as a librarian dealing with the public. Now, retired and finally getting in touch with all the anger that builds up from years of being too nice for my own good. The state of the country and the weight of this pandemic give me plenty to be angry about. Thanks for reminding me that I have things to be grateful for like my writing and being retired so I don’t have to go out risking death for a job.